Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Beethoven and Hope

We have a huge set of Beethoven on vinyl that my husband picked up years ago at a thrift store for a few dollars.  It, and a few other choice LPs, are the reason we make sure we always have a record player.

Even though we've had this set for a very long time, I just started playing it again yesterday.  We've listened to it all morning now.

As my three year old is sitting on the couch with the stomach flu and my younger two are demanding their share of attention, the music is reminding me of the beauty I want to fill their lives with.  The little things I can do to make our home lovely, for all of us, that help me remain thankful and see all our blessings in the midst of what is, otherwise, a pretty low day.

This musical backdrop is reminding me that I can choose to respond to my daughters illness with anxiety and anger that things can't be perfect for her, or I can respond with a level head, with snuggles and warm tea.

In other words:  I can set the emotional temperature in my home today, 
instead of being swayed by the circumstances.

I suppose it helps that this verse was in my reading plan today:

Ephesians 4:14-15

New American Standard Bible (NASB)
14 [a]As a result, we are no longer to be children, 
tossed here and there by waves 
and carried about by every wind of doctrine, 
by the trickery of men, 
by craftiness in deceitful scheming; 
15 but [c]speaking the truth in love, 
we are to grow up in all aspects into Him 
who is the head, even Christ,

Beethoven's music reminds me of spring, and little birds and beauty.
Check out this beautiful photograph for sale Here.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Friday is Kitchen Day

Our homeschool preschool has gone amazingly well this week.  Monday I started using Manangers of Their Homes by Teri Maxwell and it's made a world of difference.

So, since the week has been so good and I wanted Fridays to be a little special I decided to make it a kitchen day today.  I'm having the kids help me make food.  So far we've made a salad and talked about all the vegetables and put some ingredients in the bread maker for dough for a pumpkin pastry.   We did those things during the normal 'pre-school' half an hour time slots and then we did our normal 15 minutes with mommy per child.  It's been a great morning!  And we even had the added thing of daddy getting to stay home an extra two hours this morning and mommy waking up late, which usually leaves the day in total shambles, but not today!

Now that we are in the full swing of things, I'll be posting more.  AND since my camera is found and functional again there will be pictures!  Hooray!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Reflecting on what is the most important

In the aftermath of this flu, I see tons of messy dishes, baked on food, (mold), stuff all over the floors, tons of unwashed laundry.  And an angry, overwhelmed, anxious self.

I know it's probably not true, but I see never ending weeks ahead with just one good day a week and the rest just full of angry, tears, the need for escape.

This is not turning anyone's heart toward God, not at all.

I was talking with a girlfriend a few days ago and we gave ourselves some home work: find out what you ARE, instead of always what you AREN'T.  So, I asked God.  I wanted to hear affirmation of things I already knew about myself, like I'm thoughtful and creative or I'm good at seeing possibility in almost anything.

But you know what I heard?

Loved.  I am Loved.

I wanted to write it off.  I wanted to say, yea, yea, we're all loved, that's why You died on the cross, but what am 'I' that's like special?

Loved.

So, I dwelt on that a little bit.  And this truth settled over me.  I, the angry mother with the hungry, dirty, crying kids - I'm loved.  I who have been thinking mostly of myself, I'm loved.  I, who have been looking for scapegoats for all this mess for my whole life, am loved, too.

And the cool thing is, that when I look around at everything and realize that I'm loved even with all this dysfunction - I kind of want to share it.  And sharing it by hugging, and laughing and yes, even cleaning, seems like a good way to spread that around.

I even have this little shadow of a thought that maybe seeing myself as loved instead of judged will dissolve the part of me that surveys the house and gets angry, overwhelmed and anxious.

Our one consistent activity so far

Everyone but Daddy and the dog has had the stomach flu over here.

And yet, we've still been doing our one consistent activity:

Every morning around 10am, the kids color and I read aloud something from the bible.

They have been exhausted and fussy, so it's only been lasting about 15 minutes.  But, it's still something.

This is exciting!

Monday, September 5, 2011

Commited

I had been putting off cleaning my kitchen all day.  The dishes were so bad they were beginning to smell.  Only two days ago it was beautiful, funny what laziness and hot weather can produce.  No, not funny - gross.

At any rate I was ready to take advantage of my first Monday not working the evening shift since May.  I wandered over to the kitchen.  Bare feet, scraggly hair, a bit of last nights make still smudged around my eyes.  My teeth felt gritty.  My kids were fussy from two late nights in a row and doughnuts for breakfast.  They had eaten other things in the mean time, but they were in bad diet meltdown mode.

I thought:  what have I learned from Flylady?  'Dress to Shoes' is one idea she really pushes.  The idea is that we need to be prepared for our days.  We can't overcome our laziness in our PJs.  We can't be ready to do any household task, like taking out the trash, without our shoes on.  We Flybabies are just full of excuses and dressing the part eliminates a few of them.  Sometimes it eliminates the important few.

I brushed my teeth.  I put on some make up, put my hair in a pretty pony tail instead of a disheveled one, put on my tennis shoes, my apron and my MP3 player.

I stood in the kitchen and realized, it was all doable.  In fact, it was simple.  I already have a kitchen plan worked out, I just needed to start.

First thing:  dishes.  I actually remembered to take out and use my pink rubber gloves - I feel totally invincible with them on.  In fact, I was realizing, I had clocked in.  I got ready for my day, just as though it was an actual work shift and set to it.  No complaining, no grumbling - it was my job and I found satisfaction in it.  Even if 'it' was the dishes.  In reflection, this being pleased with my work and not bitter about it is pretty revolutionary!  I think I'll be 'clocking in' a lot more often these days.

My two year old and three year old were so excited to see that I had rubber gloves just like their grandma's.  They were asking me about them and I told them, well, I use them when I'm really committed.

I'm glad to be back in the evening mix instead of working at that time of day - I'm glad to be committed to my family again.

Purpose Statement

I'm so excited!  I finally have a working purpose statement!

You can see it here:

Impressing Hearts